Wednesday, February 18, 2009

The Devil runs the DMV!!!

I swear it! When you die, if you have been naughty, and I mean reeeeally naughty, you don't go to Hell. No, that would be just too nice of a place. You go to the worst place EVER to have been created in the slimy-est, meanest persons head. You go to the DMV. Lest you think "Oh, Samantha, the DMV isn't that bad! I've been there tons of times!" Let me remind you that you have never been to the DMV in SIN CITY. For that is where the Devil unleashes his awful wrath and laughs insidiously while you clench your rejected papers with a quivering chin and a waterfall of tears about ready to explode down your face. The same DMV that offers deliciously appealing junk food at their little snack bar, knowing that you will be shocked and slump to a little heap on the floor when you weigh yourself the next day after you've eaten a DMV hot dog. Little did you know the devil himself infused that innocent little weiner with specially prepared DMV SUPERfat. And of course, a DMV experience wouldn't be the same without the ever famous 3 hour wait. You think I joke?! Not in Sin City! The little screen posted high above your head gives you a false hope that maybe if you stare at it long enough, it'll just give in and post your number. But you forget! Everyone else is trying to stare down this little screen, and so you have 150 people (in your letter category ALONE!) and their headpower, ahead of you. To make sure you're experience is just. . .uber-uncomfortable, you get to sit in hard little plastic chairs next to smelly old people, creepy Mexican's and black people with 6 kids. (Ok, sorry). Now, one would think that at the end of this dark and satanic experience, one would accomplish to task that one set out to accomplish in the first place (overlooking the ridiculousy high fees with a smile!). But, that would actually be a happy thing. No, to make sure you keep this experience with you, the devil and his little helpers like to make sure they are ridiculously un-helpful before turing you away. UNHELPED and without answers! I think they really took Nancy Reagans catch phrase to heart when she said "Just say NO!". Ack!

Are you getting the picture here? Last night Kris and I tried to renew my registration online (because it's expired. . . oops). Well, when we couldn't do, or rather, the site wouldn't let us do it, Kris looked at me and said, "So, you gonna go the DMV tomorrow?". I groaned. But, today I went with baby, and said to Marin as we drove in "Ok! This is going to be a good experience!". Little did I know I would be exiting on the same pavement 3 hours later on the verge of tears. After waiting 3 hours for my number to be called, I was told my drivers license could not have an updated address because New York State wanted some more money, and my registration couldn't be renewed because our insurance company failed to mail the DMV proof of insurance (almost a full 2 years ago!). Ugh! I wanted sooo badly to start fighting with the teller, but I bit my cheeks (habit) and thanked her and left. Although I am proud of mysef for holding my tongue. Sooo, this means I get another turn at the DMV.

Ok. I've vented, so moving on. Last night I went to a recipe swap for Relief Society which was waay fun. I always love the cooking ones, and this one had some yummy food. Some meat pie, and teriyaki chicken and chicken adobo and sweet rolls and a few other things. I liked this one because there were quite a few women I didn't know, so I got to meet some new people.

Well, I don't want to post pics of my sweet baby in this very negative blog, so I'll post some later :)

1 comment:

Tabitha said...

Ick! That sounds awful! I'm sorry you had to go through all of that.